Get that weak s#!t out of here!

Elise dug up this brilliant long-form version of the old "Terry Tate, Office Linebacker" commercials, and it's worth watching again. And again and again, and then thinking of others who need a good ol' whuppin' from Terry. A couple suggestions, off the top of my head:

1A. People who grab everything off the printer without checking to see if it's all their own.
1B. People who don't return the things they took from the printer that weren't, in fact, their own.
2. People who study what's on your computer screen. Don't worry, Chumpo: I minimized the windows showing my bank account information, porn websites, and al-Qaeda instructional videos.
3. People who print out all of their emails. The "e" in "email" doesn't stand for "environmentally destructive," you e-diot.
4. People who ask me to attend four half-hour meetings in one day.
5. People who think up silly high-schoolish stuff like "Spirit Days" for the office. I have an identity, thank you. I don't need to wear company colors to feel good about myself.