Super Blessed

How is it that I got so lucky? Here I am, in the middle of a trying pregnancy rife with tenacious nausea, crazy levels of exhaustion, and myriad distressing pelvic problems---in other words, here I am, often feeling both very pregnant and quite terrible---and, in response to an online link we sent out to our loved ones of a collection of Julia's-birthday snapshots, I get back a bunch of e-mails from incredibly kind and generous friends who effusively tell me that Julia is adorable, that I look lovely and fit, and that our new house and yard are glowing and summery.

I mean, really. What did I do to deserve such sweet, sweet friends who say such overly kind things to a pale, achy pregnant woman whose biggest goal is to make it just ONE DAY without giving in to the temptation of not only a fully-caffeinated iced latte but ALSO a nice frosty Diet Coke later in the day (not to mention the chocolate)? Or whose most healthy lunch in the past week involved large quantities of grease and cheese (there's CALCIUM in there--that's healthy, right)? Or who has been repulsed by most (non-caffeinated) liquids for the past six months, despite constant dehydration, leading to the desperate consumption of questionable sugary drinks in an attempt to drink anything that might not make me gag? Seriously, people, prenatal nutrition this time around is a sad, sad subject. I'm just so, so tired and so, so busy. I have no energy or motivation to care.

But I digress (sort of). What I was originally going to say was, I (and thus, we) are really so blessed. You heard all about it in the post about Julia's birthday, and now Julia and I have had a wonderful week---one that may seem like nothing too special to many people, but which to me was truly cherished and appreciated. The e-mails I received today from our nice friends paying me compliments and expressing such tender joy toward our little family is just the latest happy happening. The rest of the week was great, too.

You see, the weather here has been fabulous lately---truly summery for a few weeks straight. This means that, for the first time since Christopher started commuting down to Northfield from our old house in south Minneapolis last October to begin his new job, I have been able to get out of the house with Julia on a near-daily basis, because Christopher has been able to bike to work and therefore I have had transportation available to me. We own one car between us, and in our old urban days, Christopher took the bus downtown to his former job and I had the car at home, so Julia and I could go to the grocery store, doctor appointments, friends' houses, run errands, whatever. Then he got the job down here, and in October I became car-less. For several months, while we waited for our house in Minneapolis to sell so we could move, I had only Julia's stroller and my own legs for our transportation. As awful as it was to be trapped mostly in the house with a baby for months on end, we were within walking distance of a few sanity-saving places, including a friend's house, two playgrounds, a coffeeshop, a crowded cafe, a tiny bodega, and a small neighborhood grocery store. Still, on rainy/snowy days, life was tough, and you don't know how much you need to go places until you have no way to get there. Nor do you know how much the BABY needs to get out and do new things and be exposed to something other than her same old toys day after day until it's just the two of you and the four walls, and the baby is so unstimulated that she never gets tired out enough to nap.

Then we moved to Northfield, in the middle of winter, and I found myself even more stranded. We now live in a.....I hate to utter the word.....SUBDIVISION. Meaning, there is no place we can walk to. There are sidewalks in our "neighborhood," but they don't connect to anyplace one would need to go. (Let me explain here that we would have much preferred a different location but our price range limited our options.) We're on the edge of town, and the streets leading 1-1/2 miles to the core of cute little downtown Northfield, with its shops and library and grocery store and cafes, are all shoulder-less, sidewalk-less county roads. It's not safe, at least not with a small child (plus the distance would really test the patience of most stroller-bound toddlers). So, until the weather really cleared and a few other circumstances changed so that Christopher was able to begin regular bike commuting, Julia and I were pretty much confined to our house, aside from stroller walks around our neighboring townhouses.

This week we did stay home one day, because there are still some days Christopher needs to drive. But after that we had the best, busiest, most fun week together we've probably ever had, and the effect it had on Julia really illuminated just how much she, too, needs to get out and about.

On Tuesday we were invited over to the house of a little baby buddy of Julia's from her winter toddler class. His mom called in the morning and asked if we wanted to drive out to their house in the country to play. Julia and Nicholas spent two hours in their swimsuits on the enclosed, toy-filled deck, playing in a baby pool and with a water/sand table, while Nicholas's mom and I sat in patio chairs and talked. It was fabulous. On Wednesday we had the regular meeting of a new twice-monthly playgroup at another acquaintance's house. Her toddler is the proud owner of THREE Elmo dolls, so Julia was in a state of nirvana. On Thursday Julia and I met up again with baby Nicholas and his mom, to go swimming at a local hotel that lets parents and tots use their indoor pool for a nominal charge. Julia had never been swimming in a real pool before, and after 90 minutes there, she went home, inhaled an enormous lunch, and immediately crashed for a two-hour nap. (Mama was in a state of nirvana then.) Today, we ran two errands and ate a snack at our favorite coffeeshop; not quite as exciting as our other outings this week, but fun nonetheless and Julia was patient and cheerful throughout.

This whole week, as we have been able to leave the house most every day to do new and fun things either alone or with friends, Julia has slept late every morning and napped at least two hours every afternoon. She's been energized and excited about everything, with almost no displays of the boredom I so frequently see when we're at home every day. When we have come back home after a novel activity, she has happily wandered over to her regular toys and explored them, rather than refusing to play with them or entertain herself as she usually does. In kind, despite my ongoing fatigue and pelvic pain, I've been happy and content, thrilled to be connecting with the outside world a little more and pleased with the prospect of giving Julia a fun-filled summer with me before the new baby comes.

All in all, it's just made me feel very blessed. Such fun days, combined with such sweet and supportive comments from our friends today, make me feel like maybe I'll be able to make it through this pregnancy.

I know Julia feels blessed too, because one of her most frequent utterances is, "Baby Julia so happy!" Sometimes she says, "Baby Julia so happy to be here!" One look at her joyful face and you can just tell she really, really means it.